Ethan is two months old today! I can hardly believe it - this month just FLEW by for me. Ethan is doing extremely well and is such a happy little boy! He wakes up in a good mood almost every morning - smiling and making little cooing sounds. It just melts my heart and I still cry about twice a week at how lucky I am. The "mysterious disappearing hair" on the top of his head is slowly being replaced by a dark fuzz. SO soft! It has some red in it too so who knows what color it will end up! His eyes are definitely turning hazel but that doesn't mean they will stay that color. He has until 6 months to figure it out. He is KING of spitting up and rarely stays in the same outfit all day. My dad calls him the "little clothes horse" because of the two to three new outfit changes a day :)

The only "challenge" we are currently dealing with is sleeping. Ethan only goes down for naps if I rock him to sleep which can take anywhere from 2 minutes to 45 minutes. If put down while still awake he just cries. And cries. And cries. And cries. Part of the problem is that he hasn't yet found his thumb and has only a passing interest in a pacifier so he has no self-soothing skills. Hopefully he will figure out one of the two this month so I can actually have a break during the day!

I have been having a great time and finally feel like Ethan's mom. For a long time there it felt like I had been assigned to the babysitting job from hell!! 24-7 without pay and his parents were never coming home. Then one day Ethan looked up at me and turned himself inside out smiling at me and I knew that HE knew I was him mom. And it changed everything. :) I just LOVE him - love being around him and taking care of him. Love feeding him and playing with him. Being a mom truly suits me and I have never been happier!!

The only hard part for me is that I seem to have a hard time not knowing all the answers. I worry about not being a good mom. When I let Ethan cry I worry that he won't know I love him and when I pick him up when he cries I worry that I am spoiling him. I suppose that's all normal and that I will figure out what works for us in the end. It would also be nice to have a great partner around to rely on - to give me breaks when I need them and to confer with when I don't know what to do. But even with all that, I wouldn't trade him in for the world and am having the time of my life!

In my spare (ha ha ha) time, I have been mall-walking three times a week in hopes of losing the weight from pregnancy. I am also eating low fat and have virtually cut sugar from my diet. I'm within 7 pounds of my pre-pregnancy weight and will probably keep going when I reach "ground zero". I go back to work on Monday - my mom will be watching Ethan at home for the two days I will be working so I will still get to breastfeed him. I wish I could stay at home with him full time, but SOMEONE has to buy the diapers and the cats can't seem to find work (bad market for their skill sets). On Fridays, I have been going to play class. Not only do Ethan and I have a great time with new songs and getting to see all the "big kids" (four month olds), it is nice to know that I am not the only person in the world who would sacrifice a limb for a full night's sleep (although some nights I get six hours in a row! WHOO HOO)! I am hoping to find some moms with similar interests - or even some that just eat lunch! I have been missing having a multitude of good female friends in the area and decided that it is time to get out there and start making some again! I have also been looking into finding people that play board games in the area and will hopefully have found a group before too long.

Just as a footnote, I have been putting up an occasional picture/info
on my website for those of you who don't get enough in my once a month update! Until next time!!!